The Places You Will Go

Animal passions: David Sedaris's modern fables | Books | The Observer

The vigilant rabbit is appointed security guard by the anxious creatures of the forest. Illustration: Ian Falconer

via guardian.co.uk

Posted via email from daphnelee's posterous

The award-winning writer David Sedaris has given Aesop's Fables a modern twist in his latest book, Squirrel Seeks Chipmunk. Here, we publish two exclusive extracts featuring Rabbit, a psychopathic security guard, and a judgmental hairdresser.

Monster Classics

First, the Bennets had to deal with zombies. Now the Dashwoods have to deal with sea monsters.

That's Colonel Brandon on the cover - looking very like Davy Jones from the Pirates of the Carribean movies.

And if you agree Austen's novels need to be livened up with the undead and other beasties, the new sequel to Pride and Prejudice, My Darcy, Vampyre, reveals that Lizzie's dashing new husband has an aversion to garlic and crucifixes.

Hands, Teeth and Disintegrating Noses

By DAPHNE LEE

From Tots to Teens, StarMag

ZOMBIES. Hmmm .... I've never found zombies scary. They're pretty disgusting, but I'd be more likely to laugh at them than run screaming or cower under the bedclothes. I invariably think of zombie movies as comedies. Rotting men and women with bits falling off ... so what? Is it because I used to work in a hospital that bloody putrefecation holds no horror for me?

Perhaps if they moved more quickly ... I mean, sure it's horrible to be eaten alive but if you can outrun those that want to make a three course meal out of you then what's the big deal? Plus, a few whacks with a chair and they fall apart. Of course zombies might be a metaphor for demanding, permanently emotionally-hungry men who fall apart easily. Now, that's something to keep you up nights!

Ms Bennett and the Severed Head

Jane Austen and zombies? Whatever next? Enid Blyton and vampires? Thomas Hardy and werewolves? John Keats as von Helsing?

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies: The Classic Regency Romance - Now with Ultraviolent Zombie Mayhem by Seth Grahame-Smith is on the New York Times' bestsellers list.

Read the article in The Guardian here. What caught my eye though was that Elton John's production company is "developing another monstrous take on the novel in Pride and Predator." Don't tell me! Darcy and Collins get it on!!

Lyra Silvertongue is Now Friends With Iorek Byrinson

Which fictional character would and wouldn't you add as a friend on Facebook?

A Sensitive and Humorous Portrayal ...

I'm certain that i'm very guilty of repeating myself in book and music reviews, using "favourite" phrases and words to help me say what I want about a book/CD. It's only mildly comforting to know that I am not the only one guilty of it.

Read this article in The Telegraph, about cliches that crop up in book reviews. How many of them have you used?

Maybe They'll Use the Cliff Notes Versions

Linked in Read Roger: The poshest bookclub in LA?

"I know we're supposed to be discussing Emma, but I thought we'd try something a bit more me instead."

Buy, Buy, Buy!

I found this online and could definitely relate, as will anyone who collects children's books that are mostly out-of-print ...

The Collector’s Nightmare
(Tune: This Old Man)

What to choose? Can’t pick one!
Now my nightmares just begun!
There are Blyton, Oxenham,Needham and Jane Shaw,
Fairlie Bruce and many more.

Can’t afford to buy two,
Children’s Press will have to do!
‘Cause there’s Compton,
Buckeridge, Streatfield and the rest,
Have to settle for second best.

On the shelf I’ve found three,
Which one is the one for me?
I’ve found Bunter, Ballet Shoes,
Biggles and beyond,
Bobbsey Twins and Michael Bond.

Catalogues? I’ve had four,
Can’t stop sending off for more.
They’ve got Ransome, pony books,
Forest and Brazil,
Courtney, Johns and Lorna Hill.

Tolkein, Famous Five,
Won’t come out of this alive!
All my shelves are full, but I cannot
seem to stop,
I keep buying out the shop!

Don't Tell the Children!

Children's book titles you'll never see: There are some hilarious ones here, here and here.

And then there's the spoof in The New Yorker, obviously written in response to the recent controvery over the word "scrotum" in Newberry Medal-winner The Higher Power of Lucky, by Susan Patron.

One Day You're a Planet, the Next ...

In Roger Sutton's blog:

Pluto was a planet.
But now it doesn't pass.
Pluto was a planet.
They say it's lacking mass.
Pluto was a planet.
Pluto was admired.
Pluto was a planet.
Til one day it got fired.

From Comets, Stars, the Moon, and Mars: Space Poems and Paintings by Douglas Florian, to be published by Harcourt in April.